A Voice for the Voiceless

Before I even get started, I thought I’d let you know who I am. I’m a military widow and gold star wife. I was going to try and start my own blog to give voices to the voiceless. I was one of the voiceless. My husband was killed on Ft. Drum in 2008. It’s not something easy for me talk about, still. So please bear with me.

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The reports in the news, were a mess of misinformation and insanity. The army actually apologized at the time because the public relations office had no control over what happened, there were to many civilians involved. It was horrible night for me and my children. We were put in the middle of hostage situation because my husband was in the middle of psychotic break, they backed him in a corner so he did what he was trained to do, and had trained people to do. I watched in horror, screaming at him from the stairs as he handcuffed them with their own handcuffs and had both their own guns too their heads. I was not allowed to go with him to the hospital but I never made back in the house before the last two shots fired. We had escaped out of a second story window. Once the kids were over the fence to safety, I turned to go back in the house when the last two shots were fired. They never let me see him, they kept telling me he was ok, while we sitting in the MP station. It wasn’t until hours later, mind you and I had been asking for his command the whole time, then a female CID officer came in to ask me to sign a paper for the a death investigation. Yes, that’s how I was told. At that point I had no idea he was dead or for that matter who was dead . The first words out of my mouth “was this suicide by cop“?

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The press was horrible to us. The web was worse. Our address on the military base was published, so the army was forced to move us. There was a civilian police page saying he deserved it. They weren’t there. They didn’t have to notify his father on the west coast because it was already on the news and the casualty office hadn’t gotten there yet. Hearing a Viet Nam vet break down on the phone is something you never forget, not that I will ever forget any of it. Especially all the slander.

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I tried to get public attention to the problem of military suicides back then but no one wanted to listen. I gave up the fight, to protect my children. It may not have helped, it may have made things worse. I didn’t want them hurt anymore with what was being said about their father, so I stayed in the shadows. Now it’s 22 a day . I know great stat. Yet it’s still seeming to fall on deaf ears.

I’m an old hippie really even though if you knew me I’m a goth but I’m Buddhist/Pagan first and foremost. I do practice what I teach. I’m done hiding. I only have my voice and my silly ability to write to help. If you count the gold star , I am willing to use it if and when I have too.

I know my husband wold support me in this. He supported all my other eccentricities, even if it was at odds with job sometimes. I want to change the direction of the dialogue. I want to be able to tell the stories of all you out there fighting for the homeless, fighting for civil rights, fighting to make this place a better world.

I don’t want to see another gifted person suffer under an unjust law. Just because the times ,are not in keeping, with the new movement in civil disobedience doesn’t mean it’s wrong. Who’s really being hurt here? The people gifted enough to be able to use technology to save lives or bring injustice to the public ? There’s something inherently wrong with that statement. We can no longer trust the press. They proved that, time and time again.

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So this is me in a nutshell.

I’m currently working on the #FreeMartyG campaign. SO you can expect me to write about whats going on with him. If Rolling Stone can’t get an interview maybe I can, it will be real snail mail. I would love to get the stories of your comrades in arms somewhere in their own words. Humanize them again. Somewhere along the lines “Anon” has been demonized. The truth needs to be out there. Even if it’s stories from the people you have helped, that may even be more important to turn this around.